The (ACCURATE) Documentary of Bowser

The (ACCURATE) doccumentary of Bowser is a story made by the one and only InterentProblem.

WARNING: Swearing, violence, and reference to drugs is in the story

Synopsis
Who is this Bowser you ask? well find out!

Script
Narrator: It's time to learn about the famous person for video games Mr. Bowser who is this person with his spiky toe nails his favorite show his own chef and his son (screams)

Narrator: Born in 1967 this is how his mother first responded to him

Margaret: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

Narrator: He was really hated by his parents, that they agree to never put him up for adoption, even though Bowser would like it

Bowser's Dad: RUN BITCH RUN

Bowser: What do I do now?

Narrator: Just tell us you're life as a kid

Bowser: I was one cool boy back then

Narrator: Bowser was then stuffended with a time machine which saw Mario join for a stupid visit in 1970

Narrator: The 2 became villians ever since

Bowser: I will get you Mario one day! one day (cries)

Mario: Bowser was a mean guy mainly at school

Narrator: On August 28th 1972, Bowser went to 1st grade for the first time he was a good boy in class (sort of)

Teacher: AH JESUS CHRIST

Narrator: He was very popular in 2nd grade normal between 3rd and 7th grade then in 8th grade he saw his first love, Shelby

(Romantic music plays)

Bowser: Hello

Bowser: Girls will always want me!

Chef Pee Pee: Now you're a lazy bastard

Bowser: SHUT UP YOU GODDAM CUNT

Narrator: But then things went down hill, in 10th grade, Bowser was caught using drugs these drugs caused dramatic effects

Bowser: (Gets very angry)

Narrator: He's acting normal right now he's rampage would go on and on

Bowser is seen swimming naked causing 2 people in the pool to scream

Larry: GET THE FUCK DOWN FROM THERE!

Bowser: Try, bitch

Narrator: The effects were so powerful, Bowser started breathing fire, causing him to burn down the whole school

Larry: THAT IDIOT COST ME THE WHOLE SCHOOL! I HOPE HE DIES IN HELL!

Bowser: (sings)

Larry: WHAT IS THIS SOME KIND OF DIS? JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP

Narrator: Somehow Bowser made it through and be part of the Class of '85 despite the use of drugs

Bowser: DON'T TELL THE POLICE I'M HERE

Narrator: After hope and passing college at 20, a mircale happend he got a job

Bowser: Anything?

X: Sorry but there's no job

Bowser: I'm sad

X: A new job just came!

Bowser: WHAT IS IT?

X: McDonald's welcome!

Bowser: (screams)

Narrator: Then Bowser became a McDonald's worker he was a great chef well sort of

Bowser: It was great cooking the burgers and fries but there is one rule DO NOT ADD POOP INTO THE FOOD!

Narrator: One day, Bowser recieved a phone call from Mario

Mario: Dear Bowser, I know you won't care but come over I want to have dinner with you yours truly, Mario

Narrator: Bowser in his first look at the house tried to get into Mario's house starting a new life for him

Unknown: WARNING INTRUDER ALERT! WARNING INTRUDER ALERT!

Toad: I used to think OH MY GOD THAT'S SO AWESOME! when someone came to the door but when I came across Bowser I wanted to kill myself

Narrator: Mario was no where to be seen instead there was a blonde girl in the house

Bowser: WHAT DID YOU DO TO BOWSER HE WAS GONNA GIVE ME A JOB?

Peach: And that is why I hate Bowser and him kidnapping me

Bowser: Then Bowser bought the house in a deal with Mario worth $655K

Narrator: Then everyone moved in and Bowser saw Mario & Peach (cringes)

Narrator: Everything was good when Bowser got the money from his true job in 1999, when he found a company called Nintendo back then Nintendo was developing Super Mario Bros and was looking for a villian to use

Bowser: You know who's a bad guy? Bowser!

Doug Bowser: As Reggie said, My Body Is Ready!

Narrator: And that's how Bowser became a villian of Mario with the latter becoming the mascot of Nintendo, don't believe me? look it up!

Narrator: Lot's of games were made about Mario and then Mario and Bowser both became millionaires yay!

Mario: I became famous

Narrator: But then rumous came that after Mario Kart DS was released, Bowser was caught using drugs in Nintendo

Bowser: HEY THOSE MUSHROOMS TASTED REALLY GOOD!

Narrator: Then Bowser got arrested, got drunk yada, yada, yada, he got fired, divorced his husband after his son Bowser Junior was born

Bowser: How about now?

Narrator: Nowadays he watches Charleyyy & Friends 24/7 and has a very sexy chef for a slave OOOH YEAH!

It shows a picture of Bowser with the words "Bowser 1967-Charleyyy" on the bottom

Narrator: So live on you nice Charleyyy & Friends mega fan, I will miss you (sniff)

Chef Pee Pee: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!

Timeline

 * 1967: Bowser is born according to the Narrator, even though he was ugly according to his mother his father was glad it wasn't a girl so it "wouldn't lay eggs" they both agree not to put him up for adoption
 * 1970: With a time machine, Mario meets Bowser for the first times and become rivals as Mario wouldn't give him a cookie
 * 1973: At 6 years old, Bowser starts attending school and was a "star" student (despite setting his teacher on fire), became popular but danced causing freak out in the changing rooms and meets his ex-wife, Shelby for the very first time
 * 1982-1983: Bowser is caught using drugs causing dramatic effects which caused him to burn down the whole school costing his for teacher, Larry the whole school
 * 1985: Bowser graduates high school and is upset that one of the other students, Mario went on to date Bowser's dream girl, Peach and in real life, Nintendo released Super Mario Bros for the NES
 * 1987: After trying to get a job, he gets a job, at McDonald's he "liked" it for some reason
 * 1990: Bowser gets a call from Mario for a dinner, but at the time no fast food workers were allowed causing a Chain Chomp to go after Bowser
 * 1993: Toad meets Bowser for the first time at first, Toad was really happy and called it a miracle seeing someone new for the first time but it turns out Toad does not like him and wants to kill himself
 * 1996: Mario was no where to be seen and Peach was in the castle eating a sandwich and Bowser punches it to the ground making her cry like a baby and bought the house from Mario for over $655K
 * 1999: Bowser quits McDonald's so he can get a job at Nintendo telling the CEO that kids will be scared of him but they will still like him cause Mario, the CEO agrees
 * 2005: The news make rumors that Bowser was taking drugs at Nintendo, causing him to go to jail, scam kids with free candy (drugs), become drunked out at bars and did other illegal shit (even though this continuted until November 2007)
 * 2009: Due to all of what happend between 2005 and late 2006, Bowser got fired from Nintendo (even though Bowser still works for Nintendo and gets lots of money from Mario games)
 * 2011: Bowser hires Chef Pee Pee as his personal chef under a 10 year slave contract
 * 2013: Bowser's favorite show, Charleyyy and Friends debuts for the first time
 * 2013-Now: Bowser still watches Charleyyy and Friends alot, caring it more then his son, tortures Chef Pee Pee
 * Charleyyy: Bowser dies (probably due to watching Charleyyy and Friends in a unhealthy way)

Trivia

 * The narrator calls Bowser simply by his name even though he called him Mr. Bowser at the beginning